.." "Feel what?" "Unwhole. I feel empty. I feel lost. I feel like..... I am very blessed, and I realize it. But is this the life we want to live? Is t...is the life we should live? Maybe I should have taken the job offer in Tulsa and gotten a farm house. Sacramento is a bad gang area, and the schools are awful. What of the kids? What of anything." Bailey, who is sitting next to him now, kisses him deeply, and says, "You do everything right, babe, stop second guessing yourself. You're my husband. "You're probably wondering what happened to you."It was a severe understatement. Unable to do much else, I simply lookeddown at... I hesitated to call it MY body--the body that I somehowinhabited. Even just the hands in my lap were astonishing--small andrefined, decorated with a vibrant shade of purple--they seemed utterlyforeign. Of course, it didn't help that I was looking at them gentlyfolded over a skirt. That obviously feminine article of clothing wastight enough to let me know that there. This was proven true when she got out to get drinks and got back in on the other side of the tub while two others slid over next to either side of me and pressed their nude bodies up against me.The next night in the spa pretty much the same was going on with drinks free flowing and all the women nude in the spa and we took turns getting out for more drinks. All the women, and now Alexis included, kept teasing me about keeping my swimsuit on which caused me great consternation because Alexis. I feel it sometimes, but I'm so busy trying to learn that I don't let myself go. That's what I want, I want that feeling."It was time for some strong refreshment. While I was enjoying a drink, the kids were sent to bed below decks. The adults not tending to kids were all in the salon talking about Italy. Steve said, "Sue contacted Eduardo, the guide we had when we came last time. He knows his way around Italy and the Riviera, and is keeping our dates open so he can show us around. If it looks.
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